Mom

   It was the year of 1977 when mom passed away. It was very cold during the funeral and it was very usual that the venue was held in the house. I was sixteen years of age, and I had a winter vacation just right after finishing with the high school entrance exam. Mom was not feeling well for more than two years after the minor stroke.

   There was a period when I didn't recall her in details after her death. And the harder I tried to remember the more her image became fuzzy. So I decided to leave some kind of feelings to be unidentified  like what if type of questions and explanations for very long. In other words, I had tried hard to accept as it was regardless of various situations to cope with.

   It was an accidental chance to see her photos provided by my brother, and since then, her posture has been crystal clear that I could even bring out a complete description of her in every bit of details. And it has been engraved in my memory so firmly that I don't need to hassle around to recall her.

   But my mind is dried out. I don't get any emotional turbulence whenever I think of her these days. Sometimes I'm surprised to realize that I am so neutral in visualizing her image.

   It has been passed too long to impress me a kind of certain impact. But that doesn't mean I'm not missing her at all.